The Uncomfortable Experience of Knowingly Keeping Ourselves Small

One of the most uncomfortable experiences we can inflict upon ourselves is knowingly keeping ourselves small when we’re fully aware we have the power to grow.

This experience is one thing I continually see cause distress and disrupt sleep for my clients and I know it’s kept me up many nights in the past. It is something that many of us wrestle with at one point or another. That gnawing feeling that you no longer fit in your current circumstances and knowing that you have everything you need to change them, but not following through with the actions.

I’m specifically talking about when we know that growth is within our reach and can see the steps we need to take to make it happen but are knowingly keeping ourselves where we are in spite of this. This is not meant to shame, many people do not have the adequate level of agency or resources to make changes. Even when we have everything we need it can still be extremely difficult to make these changes for very valid reasons. It is incredibly challenging to get ourselves unstuck, we are creatures of habit and everything within us will pull us back toward what is safe and comfortable.

When it comes to a career path, a relationship, a living environment, and many other important aspects of life, we can have all of the knowledge we need and still struggle to take the steps to get out of a less than gratifying situation. It can be even harder to make changes when the circumstances are ‘not that bad’, despite also not feeling quite good enough or less than what we know we are capable of. One thing I have found to be particularly helpful is keeping the desired changes at the front of mind by reading and listening to books and podcasts that focus on growth and that provide helpful information on change and inspiring

messages for creating the life you want to live.

Change and growth do not happen overnight, be gentle with yourself as you navigate getting unstuck as we know that shaming ourselves is more likely to propel us backward than forward. Everyone’s process will look differently but know that you are not alone in this experience and a skilled therapist can help you to get unstuck.

Below are some of my personal favorite books and podcasts in 2023 (may not be for everyone, take what you need and leave the rest) that helped me get unstuck this year in addition to connecting with my support system, working with my own therapist, and doing EMDR work to reprocess past traumas and other adverse experiences that were keeping me stuck in old patterns.

Books:

Playing Big by Tara Mohr

The Illusion of Money by Kyle Cease

Essentialism by Greg McKeown

The Way of Integrity by Martha Beck

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

You Are A Badass by Jen Sincero

(Really any Gabby Bernstein book)

Podcasts:

Full Plate Full Cup

We Can Do Hard Things

Magic Lessons with Elizabeth Gilbert

Financial Feminist Podcast

The Minimalists Podcast

The Rich Roll Podcast

(Anything featuring Vienna Pharaon)

For more information on scheduling a consult call with me and getting started on getting unstuck in the coming year, please contact me using the information provided below. I look forward to speaking with you soon!

*This website (healingvalleyscounseling.com) and the information it contains are not a substitute for therapy. This site is not meant to provide treatment advice, only to share general psychoeducational information. Please see the disclaimer section for more information.